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Sitting here up way too late and looking at all the people on my friends list I don't feel fit to be around, to need, to be jealous of.
Reminds me of a game that a couple played in "The Killing." The Hero's girl tells him how badly she missed him and how lost she was without him, and how she's not smart (maybe she is, maybe not, we don't know) or pretty (she's undoubtedly the most beautiful person in the film) and if he leaves her she won't be able to find happiness anywhere else.
I was raised to feel nauseated at such talk, but it's just the sort of hyperbole I'd indulge in, and sometimes do, in a low-self-esteem-day kind of way. I'd rather do it the other way, but every time I think of going to the people in my life I'd love to say, for some reason, I just need to be in your life... well, it just feels dumb.
And yes, I've been looking at friends journals, and wondering why they never seem to say anything about ME. People think I'm egotistical, and maybe I am, but it's hard to tell. I'm actually the sort of person who goes around looking in mirrors because they're not sure if they exist. If I did get on film, I'd watch it, fascinated, and I'd hate it, too.
Reminds me of a game that a couple played in "The Killing." The Hero's girl tells him how badly she missed him and how lost she was without him, and how she's not smart (maybe she is, maybe not, we don't know) or pretty (she's undoubtedly the most beautiful person in the film) and if he leaves her she won't be able to find happiness anywhere else.
I was raised to feel nauseated at such talk, but it's just the sort of hyperbole I'd indulge in, and sometimes do, in a low-self-esteem-day kind of way. I'd rather do it the other way, but every time I think of going to the people in my life I'd love to say, for some reason, I just need to be in your life... well, it just feels dumb.
And yes, I've been looking at friends journals, and wondering why they never seem to say anything about ME. People think I'm egotistical, and maybe I am, but it's hard to tell. I'm actually the sort of person who goes around looking in mirrors because they're not sure if they exist. If I did get on film, I'd watch it, fascinated, and I'd hate it, too.
