(no subject)

[scyllacat]

Who's Your 80s Movie Icon Alter-Ego? Find out @ She's Crafty

Another DUH moment.

Apparently, being single means not being invited to anything anyone else is doing. They're doing it with their pre-established group of friends, or their dates. They'll sometimes let me tag along if I ask in time.

Apparently, this is not much different than being part of a couple, which was why Stan in the first place. Why does Mark give Heather what I want, but never give it to me? Why does Tor always have time for his friends, but never asks to spend time with me? Why do I ask for time, and everyone says yeah, that would be great, but then when I say, ok, ready? they've forgotten something else.

Why is it that the only way I'll get what I want is by giving up what I can't stand to lose? It's a fucking waste of time, if you ask me. I must not really want it all that much, huh?

What would you do if you knew a guy who was great in bed, but otherwise basically ordinary? What would you do if you knew a guy who was great in bed but was never going to leave the house? What would you do if you knew a guy who was great fun to be around, except he was never going to be around?

I hate my life. Because my life has always been about the people in it, and the people in it right now aren't giving me what I want. And before you say anything about how I ought to do something for them.... oh, just fuck off first. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't such a damn doormat in the first place.

Comments

[paka.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the social part is sort of the worst thing about being single. It was part of why I stopped hanging out with the SCA back east. I'm sorry you have to deal with it.